My desire could not be stronger. Alas, I kept failing. But I remembered the words in Proverbs, “For the righteous falls seven times and rises again,” Proverbs 24:16a ESV.
I woke every morning with a positive attitude, but too many times I had failed before 9 am. All the requests made for help were unanswered, yet. Finally, when I had nothing left, I was presented with perfect directions from the Word.
For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. [19] For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. Romans 7:18-19 ESV.
Of course I knew this, but busyness had crept in and my aim had become to fix the problem as quickly as possible. Finally, being reminded through the Word hidden in my heart, I became intentional to rest and reflect. During those times the Lord reminded me I am to take up my cross every morning. Next came be still, thank Him and offer Him my service, in obedience, all pieces of scripture I was so familiar with, but had not been utilizing. Following these practices worked much better than taking my load upon my shoulders and bustling through the day as if I was a superhero. Being the one in control had resulted in anxiousness, stress, foggy brain, causing the anger I now desired to eliminate.
Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:1-2 ESV.
As the Lord’s Word illuminated me, I gradually ended up back where I belonged. He pointed out that I had lost sight of the reason I am here, to serve. My anger had not diminished because, at the root of it was my constant thought that the one my Lord gave me to serve was getting in the way of things I needed to do. Truth was, all of those tasks or activities I believed I had to get done were inconsequential to what and who the Lord had laid before me.
Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Philippians 2:4 ESV.
When Peter declared that Jesus knew he loved Him, Jesus simply responded feed My sheep. Jesus also told His disciples to wash one another’s feet, as he had just washed theirs. When he was 12 years old, Jesus had told his parents he was to be about his father’s business. And that’s what he wants us to do, be about His business.
No one else knows our heart and thoughts as He does. And no one can lead us down the right path as He can. I have turned Psalm 139:23-24 into a part of my daily devotion time, “Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! [24] And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!”
I came across this quote from Elizabeth Elliott.
“It is God to whom and with whom we travel, and while He is at the end of our journey, He is also at every stopping place.”
Jesus is always with us. Call on Him and wait for His response!
~ Janice Simpson